A chapter in “together we care” (provided by Janssen-Ortho) that I ask my Grandmother to reread frequently.
“People react differently to the news that they or a loved one has a diagnosis of AD, and those reactions can change over time. One thing is certain: it is enormously stressful. At first, you may feel numb, confused, or as if the whole thing isn’t real, or you may be unable to believe the diagnosis at all. You may get depressed and angry – angry at each other, at the doctors and nurses, at everyone. Some people feel very frightened about what lies ahead; others feel guilty, thinking they should have noticed something was wrong earlier or done things differently. There’s no right or wrong way to feel about this and these feelings and emotions are quite normal.
Most people eventually accept the diagnosis and do come to realize some important things. One is that there is still time to balance the sadness of the diagnosis with happy, positive times together, and to focus on what your loved one can still do instead of what he or she can no longer do. Another is that there is quite a lot you can do to help both you and your loved one cope and prepare for the future.
It is essential to take care of yourself as well as your loved one. Caring for someone with AD is well known to be very stressful – the days can be long and you don’t just go home at 5 o’clock, either. Part of looking after your loved one is also paying attention to your own physical and mental health; if you don’t, you may end up suffering to a point where you can no longer care for your loved one.
In addition, make sure you eat well, exercise, and get enough sleep. If you have aches and pains or feel depressed or anxious, seek help for these symptoms early. Relaxation and stress management techniques like meditation and yoga may be beneficial for you.
Keep up your own life – stay involved with your own friends as well as with other family members, continue pursuing hobbies and interests, take time for yourself, and don’t “sweat the small stuff”; things like maintaining perfect housekeeping all the time will cause you more stress than they’re worth. Be realistic about what you can do – you cannot do everything.”
“Finally, be alert for signs of caregiver stress. Over the course of a single day you may go through a wide variety of emotions. But if you find yourself regularly becoming angry or even enraged at your loved one; if you don’t want to stay in touch with friends or do activities you used to enjoy; if you often feel sad, hopeless, or even suicidal; if you are exhausted or cannot concentrate or sleep, then you may be clinically depressed. Tell your doctor or your local Alzheimer Society so that you can get the help you need.”
Searching For A Moment Of Clarity 